FAT: My Journey Thru Bariatric Surgery

11 days and counting…

Esmeralda — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 22:39:42 +0000

So I am really nerveous! but Excited to this pre op diet they have me on is freaking making me starve!!! Im not bitchy Im hungry.

Anyway I know no one is probablly reading this right now but it is my hope that some one will stumble on this in the future and that it will help them decide weather or not this procedure is for them… See ya soon!

Nerves

Esmeralda — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 22:07:01 +0000

Okay so everything is set. I have done what I have to do before the surgery. Lets revise the check list: – cleared by psychologist…check – cleared by general physician…check – creepy endoscopy done…check – prepared my Last Will In Testament…check – had the god awful filter inserted to prevent blood clots [to prevent pulmonary embolism]…check – got the time cleared from work…check – got echo cardiogram to get cleared by cardiologist…check – cleared by cardiologist…check – try to eat better…check Now whats left? I still have to go back to the clinic on November 30th to have my final weigh in and the before picture taken. On that day I start going full force in my diet which is way harsh. I have a protein shake for breakfast (which I have started) Then as a snack I can have some nuts or tbsp. of peanut butter or half cup low fat cottage cheese. Lunch is 6-8 ounces of low fat yogurt and a medium size fruit… Snack is another protein shake, while dinner is 4 oz of lean protein 1/2 a cup steamed vegetables. So yeah hopefully I can lose some weight before the surgery. Truthfully I am getting nervous. I know I will be okay and I have the greatest doctor for this procedure, but it is surgery. I can only pray to the gods for help and tranquility. Two good things that are helping me stay strong is I will be under and when I wake up I will have a morphine pump i can control. What is keeping me up at nights is the pump is every 15 minutes, I am a huge baby when it comes to pain, i have to be on a ventilator and possibly a catheter… ugh gross… Im trying not to be so nervous… we will see.

Its Finally here!!!

Esmeralda — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:11:59 +0000

I’ve marked my calander ladies and gents and December 14 is the big day!!!. I am excited and nervous at the same time.

Last week I was incapacitated due to the insertion of the filter that should prevent blod clots. It was a nightmare and the recovery of that was an eye opener to how the surgery is going to hurt a billion times more…
I just got new injections in my knees and I am looking forward to this possibly being the last one EVER. More Later!

Hazrd Days Night

Esmeralda — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 12:02:06 +0000

UGH! I am dying for a cigerette and it is killing me. Its been 2 weeks with out smoking and i am dying!!! Itskilling me everytime I see a cigerette in someones hands lighting up I think mmmmm YUMMY!
AThen I smell it and get nauseaus but for that breafe second Im in envy of the smoker… Then it passes, please help me I cant smoke again…

California Dreaming….

Esmeralda — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 02:28:16 +0000

So I was reading some Fan Fic and shopping and working and studing today and begin to ponder the things I get to do when Ihave my Surgery…

I am looking forward to getting in and out of my car with out pain.

I am looking forward to buying a hybrid because i dont have to have an SUV because I dont fit in compact cars.

Looking forward to being able to walk with out saing owey.

To getting out of bed in the morning and jumping in the shower instead of popping pain meds and crawling back into bed for 30 minutes until it kicks in.

Having people STOP freaking staring at me because I am fat.

To not taking as many medicines as i am right now.

to not being pre diabetic.

to wearing a skirt with out it sticking to my but checks.

hmmmm what else? To running. I want to run, OH and ride a bike!!!! I havent riden in YEARS!!!!!

Im looking forward to not having my ass hang off the bed because my daughter kicks me off the queen size bed mever mind shes the size3 of one of my legs… Oh wait that wont change she’ll ALWAYS kick me off the bed lol

For the millionth time….

Esmeralda — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 03:44:31 +0000

Okay so this is a picture of me and my sister in 2007 when she graduated from my almamater Texas A&M Corpus Christi, Go Islanders! WOOHOO!
Okay anyhow so I was talking to a friend the other day and he was getting on me about dieting and how I shouldn’t do the surgery and hes against it. I understand and really I don’t get angry when people tell me they dont want me to have the surgery. I was in the same place 10 hell even 8 years ago. Its llike I told him I am not exactly ecstatic that I let my self get to the point that i need to pay someone to staple my stomach and reattach my small intestine. This was a long time coming. Its not like I woke one morning and said “You know I thing today I will have major surgery” Its not like that at all. I struggled with my weight and with my joint pain for 10 years before i finally reached this point.
Do not think this is a conclusion I reached lightly…

WOW!

Esmeralda — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 03:46:24 +0000

Well, I am just pondering everything thats going on in my head… I have a lot of stuff to do and not enough time. I found out for sure today that I need knee surgery but I want to wait until after my bypass so I will be lighter and have a chane of recovering better.
I spoke with Claudia today from Dr. Alleyn’s office and she said all that is left is the sleep apnea test and then we wait for the approval of the insurance. I am so excited. I wish I could have it tomorrow but I am hoping to schedule it for December but we will see. If he says it HAS to be sooner then later then I will listen to him after all he is the one with the medical degree lol.
I almost caved today and got a soda but I was able to resist. Another small victory for me!!!
Until tomorrow sweet dreams guys!

I think I am loosing it

Esmeralda — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 21:53:37 +0000

I seriously think the lack of Diet Soda is driving me slowly insane… Plus the fact that I am trying to quite smoking is nuts… I didnt think it be this hard. I am a slave to my addictions!

What was i so scared of?

Esmeralda — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 15:46:05 +0000

Okay so quickly I just left the doctors office and I was given the all clear! Dr. Kudish seems really nice and understanding and gave me the option of returning if I need to talk more after the surgery. I am glad… well talk more later!

DAy 4

Esmeralda — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 04:20:44 +0000

God I am so nervous… I have been off cokes since Friday and Its killing me it will be worth it though…